(this space for rent)

You never know what will make the difference - the thing that will open your eyes to see something in a new light. The thing that makes you rethink your life, your vocation, your dreams. It may be a little thing, but it's like turning a corner. It's the one thing that makes the addict seek help, or that makes the student finally understand a lesson they have been struggling with for weeks. And at times the "thing" has little to do with the resulting change - it is a key that opens a door to a new place.
 
For me, it happened when someone asked me if I could give him guitar lessons.

As a result I have found myself giving a lot of thought to my career as a musician, and coming to terms with my issues of self-doubt and low self-esteem. Among other things, I have come to realize that these are the issues that are holding me back from writing more -- fear that no one will be interested in what I have to say, or that someone will think less of me as a result of what I say.
 
So to overcome that, I take baby steps. This is no pity party -- this is my declaration that I will work to overcome those things that have held me back.
 
I have a lot to say, so it is just as well I am taking baby steps, and trying to write just a little bit every day. Something I might have put in one long post will now probably get serialized over a number of posts. 'Cause I have a lot I want to talk about -- how I am trying to pull my life together, what I hope to do with my music in the coming days/weeks/months, my vacation plans, what my friends mean to me, church, our flower garden, my favorite TV shows, what music I am listening to these days. It may be boring, but I'm not going to worry about that (as much) any more.
 
And believe it or not, that is a good thing.